11 May, 2008

changes

i spoke to my father this weekend, who has been fairly quiet, but supportive, about my trans identity. we talked for a while about the npr segments, which he found really interesting. at one point he called me "girl" so i asked him not to call me that and he apologized. he said that it's going to take him a while to change pronouns and names, but he's on his way. i said that i understood that it was a process for him, just as it is for me. it made me happy to hear him bring this up because he's been so quiet about everything.

i also spoke to my brother today and he called me lucas. i was surprised because i really haven't spoken to him much about anything, but he said i have his support. i guess it's calming to get support from a family member who hasn't given me any resistance to me being trans. 

and tuesday is my appointment with the endocrinologist. my good friend martha is going with me and i'm glad she's coming along - extra support. i'm not exactly sure what will happen, but i want to be prepared for the worst case scenario. i'm thinking the worst thing that will happen is that the appointment with the endo will be really expensive and my insurance won't pay for it and that the doctor won't let me start t. i just don't want to go holding high expectations and then be shot down. so updates to come after tuesday!

peace,
lucas

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

It's good to hear the family is being excepting. That's so cool about the bro! Ha who would have known :)

Good luck on Tuesday!!!

<3 Diana (previously Darnell)

Anonymous said...

this piece makes me smile. ^^
it always takes a long time for people to accept or adjust to any changes (for both sides). as your dad said, it's a process. it's amazing that he said he's on his way. it's also great that your brother's supporting.
family is the people who you love and who love you. Getting support from them is necessary and important. Knowing that they love and care about you, they're putting effort to support you, even though at the beginning it might not be in the way as you want, is necessary and important too. i feel so happy for you that more and more support is coming from your family, even just bit by bit. And I believe that more is on its way.
All the best for Tuesday and the days ahead. (^^)V